erica’s abdominoplasty blog

Last night for the first time the reality of the surgery hit me. I was laying on the couch and I was thinking about my tummy and how it was flopping over. I thought “well it won’t do that for much longer!” I got really excited thinking about it, but as quickly as that feeling came, so did some new feelings regarding reality of the surgery.

I really will be cut with a scalpel.
I really will be laid up for a while in bed.
I really will be in a lot of pain.
I really will need several months to fully recover.
I really will have a large scar.
I really will be spending a lot of money.

My stomach dropped instantly and I was immediately nervous.

For the past couple weeks I’ve talked about this surgery till I’m blue in the face. I’ve been able to talk openly and say the words, but I wasn’t exactly connecting them with something that is really going to happen. As a concept, it feels like it is still “out there.” It’s kinda like waiting for Christmas, when it feels like it will never get here. Most of the time I get wrapped up in the idea of how it will look after the fact and I forget the hard work it will take to get there. I think this is a normal reaction. I’m keeping positive and not letting myself worry.

Today the reality is that it’s 22 days away. The honeymoon phase is coming to and end, and I have to seriously come to terms with what is really going to happen. I know I’m prepared. I’m ready for a change, it’s been a long time coming.

Oh, and a car update? $1700. Yes. Really. That takes a large chunk out of what I had saved up for the surgery and means I’ll have to borrow more from my parents. I know they’re happy to help, but it’s a big blow to my ego in addition to my pocket book.

This entry was posted on Monday, April 18th, 2005 at 10:05 am and is filed under Pre-Surgery. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. Responses are currently closed, but you can trackback from your own site.